“The Pain of Becoming For the flower, it is fully open at each step of its blossoming. We do ourselves a great disservice by judging where we are in comparison to some final destination. This is one of the pains of aspiring to become something: the stage of development we are in is always seen against the imagined landscape of what we are striving for. So where we are—though closer all the time—is never quite enough.”
“Perhaps one of the hardest remedies to accept for our pain of becoming is that wherever we are in our path—no matter how flawed or incomplete—is a blossoming unto itself.”
― Mark Nepo, The Book of Awakening: Having the Life You Want by Being Present to the Life You Have
This is another reason I’ve abandoned the practice of clean dates and clean time. For me it became counter productive, reinforcing a very judgmental “failure” and return to square one.
Instead, I choose to see everything in my journey – even stumbles, relapse – as part of my dance. They are a natural part of becoming…with inherent beauty in them if I look for it, just as the budding and blooming flower.