Category: Gay Civil Rights

Courage 2.0


So that was a dick move.

The “Featured Image” from my last post!

I mean, that last post was a dick move. No not THAT way! Come on, get your mind out of the gutter. [Note to self: future blog topic on sex shaming. Why is a sexual reference dirty or ‘of the gutter?’]

And actually it WAS a dick move in THAT way on purpose! I chose to NOT cover myself with a fig leaf or otherwise hide my penis. There is nothing to be ashamed about or cover up…and IT IS ART for god’s sake! Get over your midwestern tight ass false puritanism. Unlike my page and don’t look at my art. And NEVER GO TO CHURCH IN EUROPE! (Thanks Thom Rouse!)

I mean I posted some of my art without any of my back story! That was the dick move ;). Sorry gentle reader.

Yes, the art is there to invite the viewer into a story – and each viewer will find their own meaning in whatever is created. That is what I am learning to accept and love about art!

But, I also feel drawn to tell my story. To once again find my voice again in the world. I want to create art in photographs and digital imagery as well as in spoken word or song. For now, it’s a blog. A journal. With the occasional picture. A lens into my world. And yes, into my ego!

Welcome. Hope you enjoy the ride and take something away with you. If not, maybe next time or the next person! If not, I’m ok with that. Because I’m writing this for me not you ;). (Mostly 😉 (Thanks Big Magic)

Another Case of the Closet Cases

I guess I’m also a closeted writer. Or, I’m allowing myself to admit that I like writing. I always have. I’ve often said I write better than talking “off the cuff.” I like giving prepared lectures or talks or powerpoints or proposals because I slow down enough to think about what I’m saying. And of late, I slow down enough to feel what I’m feeling. Or figure out what I am feeling, so I can figure how to actually FEEL!

Spent a LOT of money in therapy over the years to be able to write that sentence. It’s like getting a liberal art degree. Probably cost about the same 😉 (Thanks Obama!)

Why Courage?

The word came to me this week among various interactions and experiences. So I played with it, let it percolate – see what surfaces.

When I think of my friend Harold Brown and his passion for activism that quite literally landed him in the hospital but he still keeps fighting for a better world, I think of courage.

When I think of my friend Dorothy Pettet, who just announced to the world on Facebook that she is starting her medical transition, I think of courage.

When I think of the transgender bartender at The Sportsman in Lafayette, IN in the early 90’s when I hung out there and her stories of starting HER medical transition – LONG before it became safe enough for more people to come out of the gender or the binary gender closet – I think of courage.

When I think of my dad, who grew up in racially segregated Kentucky and worked hard for most of his adult life to earn enough to pay for all three of his children to go to college if they chose to, I think of courage.

When I learn more about my Polish grandmothers’ side of the family through my aunt-who’s-not-my-real-aunt Joan and the life they lived as immigrants in south philly at the turn of the century, I think of courage.

When I think of a 53 year old man trying to heal from a life of shame and trauma heaped on by religion and American society while also learning how to love and be loved by a beautiful human being who happens to be another man, I think of courage.

When I hear your story and the loss, love and pain you’ve lived through, I think of courage.

So that’s why that image came to be. Because of our collective courage.

Thanks for listening.

Keep tellin’ the story.

Signed ever faithfully,

The Right Reverend Lord C. August Peacock III

Episode 0: Pivot & Explore – Reflections after attending the International AIDS Conference AIDS2020VIRTUAL


I had the chance to attend the International AIDS Conference as part of a group of Hoosiers (the Hoosier IAC Scholarship Fund Group) who were delegates representing Indiana and the United States of America. Our collection mission is to end healthcare outcome disparities for Black and Brown peoples in Indiana; to stand for decreasing and eliminating those disparities among other peoples and promote advocacy for healthcare whenever and wherever it is needed by anyone.

On the heels of COVID-19 and the current unrest around racial injustice, I’m trying to figure out how I want to use my time, energy and talents going forward to strengthen my community activism or “artivism” specifically around Ending the HIV Epidemic in Marion County. 

PIVOT

I know I want to continue with #CelebrateUU but I also want to do more. I need to pivot my photography + art studio in response to the new reality of living with masks and social distancing. I will still do photography. But I want to use my experiences around ABCD (Asset-Based Community Development) and peer outreach to make a difference in HIV wellness in Marion County.

Explore

Welcome to Episode 0 of a new something. For now, a podcast. Might include some blogging here or at celebrateuu.org. Hopefully will include guests in the future. Could become a vlog but for now, I like podcasts as my medium of expression – subject to change 😉

Action will follow. Under what project or organizational identity is not clear, although I have some ideas. I’m just taking time to allow my mud to settle, for my water to become clear. I’ll be using the next several weeks to have intentional conversations with others to discern what comes next.

Action without vision is only passing time, vision without acting is merely day dreaming, but vision with action can change the world.

– Nelson Mandela
Reflections and Ramblings of a queer White cis-male ex-Christian cajun-born TCK

The HIV statistics I quoted are from various presentations from the Ryan White Planning Council for Marion County. I hope I got them right. If not, I’ll correct them here in the comments.

Thanks for listening to this White queer cis-male ex-Christian cajun-born TCK (not TKC as I mentioned in the podcast – should be TCK Third Culture Kid!)

Sawubona!
C. Todd Fuqua
Community Photographer, Connector & Organizer

PS: Please share your questions, comments, wisecracks. I’d like to hear from you!

Campus Tours & Cultural Racism: 50 Years Later #truthfultuesday


I’m just realizing that I was born in June of the year MLK was assassinated – 50 years ago this year. For my parent’s generation, this assassination was on the level of the Challenger Explosion or 9/11. We all remember where we were on the day when…

I remember my mom telling me that she was taking a tour of the campus at Purdue in Lafayette when the news unfolded about the assassination. I realize now that she told me this story several times over the years – it’s etched in my memory.

But I realize now she was talking about the assassination of President Kennedy – not MLK. My dad was going to Purdue for his PhD in Chemical Engineering in the early 60’s, which is why my sister was actually born in Lafayette, IN! So, mom was definitely talking about President Kennedy when she told me that story.

In fact, I don’t remember my parents ever talking about the assassination of MLK in any memorable way. And yet, they both were on the same level in terms of national and cultural significance.

That observation struck me this year for some reason. I think it’s the turning 50 thing 😉 It helped me see things I hadn’t noticed before about my cultural upbringing. It was a stark reminder that my cultural upbringing was pretty white. Most of my cultural references are therefore related to and biased towards white American history. A lot was left out in the history books, but also in the conversations we probably had around the dinner table, at Scouts or in Sunday School.

I imagine that was a difficult and confusing time for my parents – as it was indeed for a generation…indeed, much like it is today, for my generation. I know a little about the families in which my parents were raised. We had our share of colorful characters and family stories. Like it or not, they shape who we become and how we think about the world in which we live.

So let’s be truthful. We all live with prejudice and bias. I face it many times a day. Sometimes, I’m aware of it and catch myself. Most times, I’m either tired or unconsciously aware. So, the question isn’t “Do I have prejudice thoughts about another human being?” The question is, “Am I aware of my learned bias and prejudice? How do they affect my actions and decisions?”

Bias is learned. And it can be unlearned.

I’m confronted with this almost every time I interact with another person! My life experiences around gender, race, religion, sexuality, etc. affect how I think of others – which is very subjective based on my experience. The reality is my thoughts are likely not the complete – or accurate – story! If I’m not careful, it’s very easy for me to act on my preconceptions and assume things about others that are likely not true.

And we know what they say about assumptions…

I’m better off assuming that we more similar than we are different – then acting off that assumption and not my first reaction!  Not easy, but that’s what I’ve learned is important for me.

I wish I could talk with my mom more about that day when she heard the news. I think I always let her comment about being at Purdue be the end of the conversation. That’s probably because talking about topics like race makes me uncomfortable. Looking back, I regret not opening up that up for deeper discussion. There are a lot of days I’d like to ask her about…but never found the courage or time to do so. With her gone, that ship has sailed. Such is the circle of life.

My dad celebrates his 80th birthday this year. I’ll be with him on his birthday in Florida. I have lots of questions that I want to do a better job of asking now, before the experiences and memories are lost with a generation…

#truthfultuesday

‘When You’re Accustomed to Privilege, Equality Feels Like Oppression’