Courage 2.0


So that was a dick move.

The “Featured Image” from my last post!

I mean, that last post was a dick move. No not THAT way! Come on, get your mind out of the gutter. [Note to self: future blog topic on sex shaming. Why is a sexual reference dirty or ‘of the gutter?’]

And actually it WAS a dick move in THAT way on purpose! I chose to NOT cover myself with a fig leaf or otherwise hide my penis. There is nothing to be ashamed about or cover up…and IT IS ART for god’s sake! Get over your midwestern tight ass false puritanism. Unlike my page and don’t look at my art. And NEVER GO TO CHURCH IN EUROPE! (Thanks Thom Rouse!)

I mean I posted some of my art without any of my back story! That was the dick move ;). Sorry gentle reader.

Yes, the art is there to invite the viewer into a story – and each viewer will find their own meaning in whatever is created. That is what I am learning to accept and love about art!

But, I also feel drawn to tell my story. To once again find my voice again in the world. I want to create art in photographs and digital imagery as well as in spoken word or song. For now, it’s a blog. A journal. With the occasional picture. A lens into my world. And yes, into my ego!

Welcome. Hope you enjoy the ride and take something away with you. If not, maybe next time or the next person! If not, I’m ok with that. Because I’m writing this for me not you ;). (Mostly 😉 (Thanks Big Magic)

Another Case of the Closet Cases

I guess I’m also a closeted writer. Or, I’m allowing myself to admit that I like writing. I always have. I’ve often said I write better than talking “off the cuff.” I like giving prepared lectures or talks or powerpoints or proposals because I slow down enough to think about what I’m saying. And of late, I slow down enough to feel what I’m feeling. Or figure out what I am feeling, so I can figure how to actually FEEL!

Spent a LOT of money in therapy over the years to be able to write that sentence. It’s like getting a liberal art degree. Probably cost about the same 😉 (Thanks Obama!)

Why Courage?

The word came to me this week among various interactions and experiences. So I played with it, let it percolate – see what surfaces.

When I think of my friend Harold Brown and his passion for activism that quite literally landed him in the hospital but he still keeps fighting for a better world, I think of courage.

When I think of my friend Dorothy Pettet, who just announced to the world on Facebook that she is starting her medical transition, I think of courage.

When I think of the transgender bartender at The Sportsman in Lafayette, IN in the early 90’s when I hung out there and her stories of starting HER medical transition – LONG before it became safe enough for more people to come out of the gender or the binary gender closet – I think of courage.

When I think of my dad, who grew up in racially segregated Kentucky and worked hard for most of his adult life to earn enough to pay for all three of his children to go to college if they chose to, I think of courage.

When I learn more about my Polish grandmothers’ side of the family through my aunt-who’s-not-my-real-aunt Joan and the life they lived as immigrants in south philly at the turn of the century, I think of courage.

When I think of a 53 year old man trying to heal from a life of shame and trauma heaped on by religion and American society while also learning how to love and be loved by a beautiful human being who happens to be another man, I think of courage.

When I hear your story and the loss, love and pain you’ve lived through, I think of courage.

So that’s why that image came to be. Because of our collective courage.

Thanks for listening.

Keep tellin’ the story.

Signed ever faithfully,

The Right Reverend Lord C. August Peacock III

Courage


Courage 06.27.2021

Smalltown Cajun Boy

Courage

Smalltown Boy from the album The Age of Consent by Bronski Beat. 1984.

Run away, turn away.

Life 5.3


I feel like an episode of Star Trek.

Captain’s log: Stardate 06272021, 53rd loop around the Sun.

Or The Twilight Zone! Or Big Mouth! Pick your series to binge. Here we are. The next episode of the next season of the new series by the same artist! Hold on for the ride.

Inspired by Julie, Julia and several other movies or songs that influenced me over the years, here I am. In early retirement. Or taking a year sabbatical. Or, as they say in some circles, a mid-life crisis. Or two. But so far, no sports car. Although…

Some might call this taking a year to find myself. Which, maybe I should have done at 22. or 18. or 43. Or 50. Or 2020. or 53. Wait…

Or maybe I did at 18, 22, 43, 50, 2020, 53. Like I do every year. It’s called Life.

So you see. It’s just another day, in another year. Not Life 2.0. Just Life.

What’s different? What’s the same?

Today, I’m able to make different choices. For that I’m grateful. Those choices sometimes mean changing the story in my head. Because THAT’s where I let myself down. And sometimes other people. Reliving the same story line, with different actors.

Sounds so cliche I know. Until it becomes one’s reality.

Anyway. (Awkward transition…)

Today’s Focus

So the words for today are:

  • Practice
  • Courage
  • Connection
  • Peace
  • Joy

And if I were running for office, or going into early retirement to live my life (what!? novel concept!), my platforms today would be:

  • The art of being human, especially intergenational ones in community
  • The practices of abundance, compassionate communication & ABCD
  • Sexual wellness, especially in repressive, conservative midwestern USA
  • Harm reduction as a form of long-term recovery from addiction & self-harm
  • The arts, including music, photography & performance art – especially spoken word, flow arts, and musical theater
  • Travel & storytelling

Words of Wisdom

And I’m reminded of the following tips I picked up along the way:

  • Wherever we go, there we are.
  • We are all doing the best that we can.
  • Show yourself some compassion & grace.
  • Show others some compassion & grace.
  • Don’t be stingy!
  • BE
  • Be you!
  • Everyone has a story.
  • Everyone hurts.
  • Hurting people hurt.
  • Maybe they are not the enemy.
  • We are all the villain in someone else’ story.
  • The power of a question.
  • Listen.
  • Not my circus, not my monkeys!
  • When in doubt, be kind.
  • I can choose to be right, or I can choose to be happy. I choose to be happy (most days).
  • Some forms of suffering are by choice.
  • People are in our lives for a reason, a season or a lifetime.
  • No, you’re not alone. Really.
  • You’re special, you’re just not unique. Or is that the other way around?
  • Don’t be The Dragon Lady. Just don’t. Move on. That’s so 90’s.
  • Velvet rage is a thing. But don’t let it consume you.
  • Focus on the connection in social media. Leave what doesn’t serve you. It’s not all evil & conspiracy. It is what it is.
  • That which you despise most in other people is in fact what you despise the most in yourself
  • What are you going to do about it?
  • All of my stories are true. Some of them actually happened.

I just keep finding new ways to express myself. And I’m ok with that. This year, it will be intentional, with purpose. Isn’t that what Life is supposed to be about anyway?

Today’s Inspiration

The best thing I’ve seen on social media this week:

May be an image of text that says 'Maybe the journey isn't so much about becoming anything. Maybe it's about unbecoming everything that isn't really you, so you can be who you were meant to be in the first place. Author unknown'
Thanks Joshua T. for today’s inspiration!

Here is to a life of peeling back the layers of wallpaper, facades, masks, and personalities. And to choosing what story we are willing to share now.

Here is to rediscovering or discovering.

Here is to The Right Reverend Lord C. August Peacock III.

Keep tellin’ the story.

Indianapolis, IN. 27.06.2021