Author: ctfuqua

I see life as full of possibilities and the world full of beautiful people possessing unique and often untapped talents. I’m a learner and connector, seeking ways to leverage the abundance in this world through strong community.

Episode 0: Pivot & Explore – Reflections after attending the International AIDS Conference AIDS2020VIRTUAL


I had the chance to attend the International AIDS Conference as part of a group of Hoosiers (the Hoosier IAC Scholarship Fund Group) who were delegates representing Indiana and the United States of America. Our collection mission is to end healthcare outcome disparities for Black and Brown peoples in Indiana; to stand for decreasing and eliminating those disparities among other peoples and promote advocacy for healthcare whenever and wherever it is needed by anyone.

On the heels of COVID-19 and the current unrest around racial injustice, I’m trying to figure out how I want to use my time, energy and talents going forward to strengthen my community activism or “artivism” specifically around Ending the HIV Epidemic in Marion County. 

PIVOT

I know I want to continue with #CelebrateUU but I also want to do more. I need to pivot my photography + art studio in response to the new reality of living with masks and social distancing. I will still do photography. But I want to use my experiences around ABCD (Asset-Based Community Development) and peer outreach to make a difference in HIV wellness in Marion County.

Explore

Welcome to Episode 0 of a new something. For now, a podcast. Might include some blogging here or at celebrateuu.org. Hopefully will include guests in the future. Could become a vlog but for now, I like podcasts as my medium of expression – subject to change 😉

Action will follow. Under what project or organizational identity is not clear, although I have some ideas. I’m just taking time to allow my mud to settle, for my water to become clear. I’ll be using the next several weeks to have intentional conversations with others to discern what comes next.

Action without vision is only passing time, vision without acting is merely day dreaming, but vision with action can change the world.

– Nelson Mandela
Reflections and Ramblings of a queer White cis-male ex-Christian cajun-born TCK

The HIV statistics I quoted are from various presentations from the Ryan White Planning Council for Marion County. I hope I got them right. If not, I’ll correct them here in the comments.

Thanks for listening to this White queer cis-male ex-Christian cajun-born TCK (not TKC as I mentioned in the podcast – should be TCK Third Culture Kid!)

Sawubona!
C. Todd Fuqua
Community Photographer, Connector & Organizer

PS: Please share your questions, comments, wisecracks. I’d like to hear from you!

Thinking Songs – Getting Inside Your Head


“Get out of your head” – that’s what I’ve been telling myself a lot lately. I’m realizing more and more how much my thoughts affect my feelings, emotions, energy, etc. Although I can’t control my feelings – though that doesn’t stop me from trying – I can pay closer attention, and ask “Why?” Is there a thought or belief that is driving my feelings? More often than not lately, fear is often the cause. And while I may not be able to remove the fear, I can reframe – rethink – and ultimately, change how I feel.

I know it sounds crazy. But it works.

So I’m a lot more intentional about what I choose to focus on. And, I realize the music I listen to can really affect my overall mood and activity levels.

So, when I’m working around the studio, I like to play music. Sometimes, I need to focus. Sometimes I need to be inspired. Other times, I need to feel energized. Sometimes, I want to feel sad. Other times, I need to know there is a reason to remain hopeful. 

So one say, I did a search for Apple Music “thinking songs” under Playlists. And I found a gold mine! I can literally get inside other people’s head – and “try their music” on for size. Some playlists help me think. Others distract me. I discover new music – some I like, some I don’t. And, in getting inside someone else’s head – magically – I find I’m no longer stuck inside mine.

Get inside Gwyneth’s head…

Get inside Jessica’s head…

Get inside Richard’s head….

Campus Tours & Cultural Racism: 50 Years Later #truthfultuesday


I’m just realizing that I was born in June of the year MLK was assassinated – 50 years ago this year. For my parent’s generation, this assassination was on the level of the Challenger Explosion or 9/11. We all remember where we were on the day when…

I remember my mom telling me that she was taking a tour of the campus at Purdue in Lafayette when the news unfolded about the assassination. I realize now that she told me this story several times over the years – it’s etched in my memory.

But I realize now she was talking about the assassination of President Kennedy – not MLK. My dad was going to Purdue for his PhD in Chemical Engineering in the early 60’s, which is why my sister was actually born in Lafayette, IN! So, mom was definitely talking about President Kennedy when she told me that story.

In fact, I don’t remember my parents ever talking about the assassination of MLK in any memorable way. And yet, they both were on the same level in terms of national and cultural significance.

That observation struck me this year for some reason. I think it’s the turning 50 thing 😉 It helped me see things I hadn’t noticed before about my cultural upbringing. It was a stark reminder that my cultural upbringing was pretty white. Most of my cultural references are therefore related to and biased towards white American history. A lot was left out in the history books, but also in the conversations we probably had around the dinner table, at Scouts or in Sunday School.

I imagine that was a difficult and confusing time for my parents – as it was indeed for a generation…indeed, much like it is today, for my generation. I know a little about the families in which my parents were raised. We had our share of colorful characters and family stories. Like it or not, they shape who we become and how we think about the world in which we live.

So let’s be truthful. We all live with prejudice and bias. I face it many times a day. Sometimes, I’m aware of it and catch myself. Most times, I’m either tired or unconsciously aware. So, the question isn’t “Do I have prejudice thoughts about another human being?” The question is, “Am I aware of my learned bias and prejudice? How do they affect my actions and decisions?”

Bias is learned. And it can be unlearned.

I’m confronted with this almost every time I interact with another person! My life experiences around gender, race, religion, sexuality, etc. affect how I think of others – which is very subjective based on my experience. The reality is my thoughts are likely not the complete – or accurate – story! If I’m not careful, it’s very easy for me to act on my preconceptions and assume things about others that are likely not true.

And we know what they say about assumptions…

I’m better off assuming that we more similar than we are different – then acting off that assumption and not my first reaction!  Not easy, but that’s what I’ve learned is important for me.

I wish I could talk with my mom more about that day when she heard the news. I think I always let her comment about being at Purdue be the end of the conversation. That’s probably because talking about topics like race makes me uncomfortable. Looking back, I regret not opening up that up for deeper discussion. There are a lot of days I’d like to ask her about…but never found the courage or time to do so. With her gone, that ship has sailed. Such is the circle of life.

My dad celebrates his 80th birthday this year. I’ll be with him on his birthday in Florida. I have lots of questions that I want to do a better job of asking now, before the experiences and memories are lost with a generation…

#truthfultuesday

‘When You’re Accustomed to Privilege, Equality Feels Like Oppression’